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  #51  
Old 03-10-2009, 04:52 PM
TheConcretekid
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An American investment banker was at the pier of a small coastal Colombian village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large Yellow Fin Tuna. The American complimented the Colombian on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took to catch them.

The Colombian replied, "Only a little while."

The American then asked why didn't he stay out longer and catch more fish.

The Colombian said he had enough to support his family's immediate needs.

The American then asked, "But what do you do with the rest of your time?"

The Colombian fisherman said, "I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, take siestas with my wife, Maria, stroll into the village each evening where I sip wine, and play guitar with my amigos. I have a full and busy life."

The American scoffed, "I am a Harvard MBA and could help you. You should spend more time fishing and with the proceeds, buy a bigger boat. With the proceeds from the bigger boat, you could buy several boats; eventually you would have a fleet of fishing boats. Instead of selling your catch to a middleman you would sell directly to the processor, eventually opening your own cannery. You would control the product, processing, and distribution. You would need to leave this small coastal fishing village and move to Bogota, then LA and eventually New York City, where you will run your expanding enterprise."

The Colombian fisherman asked, "But, how long will this all take?"

To which the American replied, "15 - 20 years."

"But what then?" asked the Colombian.

The American laughed and said, "That's the best part. When the time is right you would announce an IPO and sell your company stock to the public and become very rich, you would make millions!"

"Millions - then what?"

The American said, "Then you would retire. Move to a small coastal fishing village where you would sleep late, fish a little, play with your kids, take siestas with your wife, stroll to the village in the evenings where you could sip wine and play your guitar with your amigos."
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  #52  
Old 03-10-2009, 07:59 PM
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What I Want In A Man!
Original List:

1. Handsome
2. Charming
3. Financially successful
4. A caring listener
5. Witty
6. In good shape
7. Dresses with style
8. Appreciates finer things
9. Full of thoughtful surprises
10. An imaginative, romantic lover


What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 32)
1. Nice looking
2. Opens car doors, holds chairs
3. Has enough money for a nice dinner
4. Listens more than talks
5. Laughs at my jokes
6. Carries bags of groceries with ease
7. Owns at least one tie
8. Appreciates a good home-cooked meal
9. Remembers birthdays and anniversaries
10. Seeks romance at least once a week





What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 42)
1. Not too ugly
2. Doesn't drive off until I'm in the car...J
3. Works steady - splurges on dinner out occasionally
4. Nods head when I'm talking
5. Usually remembers punch lines of jokes
6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture
7. Wears a shirt that covers his stomach
8. Knows not to buy champagne with screw-top lids
9. Remembers to put the toilet seat down
10. Shaves most weekends








What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 52)
1. Keeps hair in nose and ears trimmed
2. Doesn't belch or scratch in public
3. Doesn't borrow money too often
4. Doesn't nod off to sleep when I'm venting
5.. Doesn't retell the same joke too many times
6. Is in good enough shape to get off couch on weekends
7. Usually wears matching socks and fresh underwear
8. Appreciates a good TV dinner
9. Remembers your name on occasion
10. Shaves some weekends









What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 62)

1. Doesn't scare small children
2. Remembers where bathroom is
3. Doesn't require much money for upkeep
4. Only snores lightly when asleep
5. Remembers why he's laughing
6. Is in good enough shape to stand up by himself
7. Usually wears some clothes
8.. Likes soft foods
9. Remembers where he left his teeth
10. Remembers that it's the weekend








What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 72)
1. Breathing
2. Doesn't miss the toilet.
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  #53  
Old 03-10-2009, 08:11 PM
County Mike
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Damn! That guy in your "I want" list seems way older than the woman wanting him. "Good enough shape to stand up by himself" at the age of 62? Sounds more like 82 or 92 to me.
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  #54  
Old 03-10-2009, 09:10 PM
Preach
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Serra
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  #55  
Old 03-10-2009, 09:20 PM
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Well, it's not really "my" list I just copied and pasted from an email "My" list would end at the age 52 mark O think. Anything after that forget it, I'd rather stay single


Quote:
Originally Posted by County Mike
Damn! That guy in your "I want" list seems way older than the woman wanting him. "Good enough shape to stand up by himself" at the age of 62? Sounds more like 82 or 92 to me.
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  #56  
Old 03-10-2009, 10:01 PM
Bonnie Bonnie is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MattHughesRocks
Well, it's not really "my" list I just copied and pasted from an email "My" list would end at the age 52 mark O think. Anything after that forget it, I'd rather stay single
It's a crap shoot for sure!

My philosophy is there are worse things than being single!
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  #57  
Old 03-10-2009, 10:28 PM
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Like being stuck with some boring old man that you werent attracted to . I'd rather die



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Originally Posted by Bonnie
It's a crap shoot for sure!

My philosophy is there are worse things than being single!
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  #58  
Old 03-10-2009, 11:07 PM
bradwright
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MattHughesRocks
Like being stuck with some boring old man that you werent attracted to . I'd rather die
well if you really do look like Forrest then i dont see where you have a lot of options anyway.
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  #59  
Old 03-10-2009, 11:14 PM
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HEY! Forrest is hot!


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Originally Posted by bradwright
well if you really do look like Forrest then i dont see where you have a lot of options anyway.
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  #60  
Old 03-10-2009, 11:15 PM
bradwright
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MattHughesRocks
HEY! Forrest is hot!
too you maybe,(ugh)
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