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Old 01-14-2014, 07:45 PM
rearnakedchoke rearnakedchoke is offline
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Default Cat Zingano's Husband Dead

Apparently he hung himself and is dead .... poor Cat, she is having a rough year ...
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Old 01-14-2014, 07:58 PM
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http://www.cagepotato.com/bjj-coach-...arent-suicide/

Terrible thing to do to your kid. I can't imagine what would drive someone to that.
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Old 01-14-2014, 08:42 PM
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Yes, it's a terribly selfish thing to do to your loved ones who are left behind - the loved ones who probably found you, who may have had no idea you were depressed or had these thoughts of ending your life. A totally self-absorbed act. I feel most sadness for his child as well, Mike. I think we can all agree that his boy will grow up questioning what he did wrong or what he might have done to prevent his dad from killing himself, thinking his dad didn't love him enough to want to keep living. Not to mention that his dad is now forever out of his life. It's just tragic.
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Old 01-14-2014, 11:46 PM
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Having no clue what his mental status was, I hardly think it appropriate to call it a selfish thing to do or a self-absorbed act. Clearly he might not have been thinking right, and if he wasn't thinking right then chances are he wasn't just thinking of himself. People take their lives for a variety of different reasons, "It's all about me" or "It's the best thing for -me-" isn't always the case, and I highly wonder how many times it actually is just about them.

It actually surprises me when people say it is selfish or self-absorbed, because...if there is no suicide note (and even if there is) how could you POSSIBLY tell? The sheer fact that we are outsiders and making that kind of judgement boggles my mind to no end. I find it extremely insulting that we can pass judgement on a man whom we have never met, and DARE say that he is selfish or self-absorbed.

The man could have had a mental illness and we are passing that kind of judgement. Selfish would be internalizing and analyzing what would happen after. 1. My family would find me, 2. My kid would grow up with no father. These things might not even have entered his mind and that doesn't mean he was selfish in his decision. It could mean he wasn't in the right state of mind. It could mean that he was on medication that gave him suicidal thoughts. It could mean he was clinically depressed with no diagnosis.

Do we look at a child with autism and say that there lack of social skills is because they are so withdrawn inside of themselves that they only think of themselves? That they are selfish? No....why? Because we understand autism. We do not fully understand mental illnesses.

I've lost two friends to suicide. One was suffering from schizophrenia. Another we aren't sure why he took his life. He was seventeen and was extremely loving, had many friends, had sports scholarships to college. He was on a medication that could have been the cause.

We will probably never fully understand what someone's mind goes through before they commit suicide. But as people, we can come to understand that we do not know everything about mental illnesses and how it makes our minds think, perceive, and react.
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Old 01-15-2014, 01:20 AM
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I doubt his child and wife would find any of that reassuring.

Their pain is just beginning; he selfishly ended his. Just my 2 cents, Irish Pride. We will have to agree to disagree.
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Old 01-15-2014, 02:23 AM
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I think suicide is considered selfish because it only seems to benefit the person who commits suicide. Everyone else suffers so it is seen as selfish. So while I agree that it is a selfish act, I don't think we can assume they were a selfish person.

When I work with psychiatric patients most all of them express thoughts of suicide. However, there are key factors in recognizing someone who is at high risk for following through with it. Some of these do not even mention family or loved ones. They can't seem to connect with other people even on the most basic of levels. This may be why there is often no suicide note. Some of them may not even be mentally capable of considering anyone else's pain/grief. And them that do can't see passed the fact (it is fact in their mind) that the world and everyone else would be better off without them.

I think it is tragic for everyone all around.
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Old 01-15-2014, 02:30 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Neezar View Post
I think it is tragic for everyone all around.
Yes, as I said earlier - tragic.
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Last edited by flo; 01-15-2014 at 03:02 AM.
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Old 01-15-2014, 04:27 AM
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I agree 110%.
Depression is a sad, sad, life taking disease. People that are THAT deep into it are not capable of thinking about how it will affect others.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Irish Pride View Post
Having no clue what his mental status was, I hardly think it appropriate to call it a selfish thing to do or a self-absorbed act. Clearly he might not have been thinking right, and if he wasn't thinking right then chances are he wasn't just thinking of himself. People take their lives for a variety of different reasons, "It's all about me" or "It's the best thing for -me-" isn't always the case, and I highly wonder how many times it actually is just about them.

It actually surprises me when people say it is selfish or self-absorbed, because...if there is no suicide note (and even if there is) how could you POSSIBLY tell? The sheer fact that we are outsiders and making that kind of judgement boggles my mind to no end. I find it extremely insulting that we can pass judgement on a man whom we have never met, and DARE say that he is selfish or self-absorbed.

The man could have had a mental illness and we are passing that kind of judgement. Selfish would be internalizing and analyzing what would happen after. 1. My family would find me, 2. My kid would grow up with no father. These things might not even have entered his mind and that doesn't mean he was selfish in his decision. It could mean he wasn't in the right state of mind. It could mean that he was on medication that gave him suicidal thoughts. It could mean he was clinically depressed with no diagnosis.

Do we look at a child with autism and say that there lack of social skills is because they are so withdrawn inside of themselves that they only think of themselves? That they are selfish? No....why? Because we understand autism. We do not fully understand mental illnesses.

I've lost two friends to suicide. One was suffering from schizophrenia. Another we aren't sure why he took his life. He was seventeen and was extremely loving, had many friends, had sports scholarships to college. He was on a medication that could have been the cause.

We will probably never fully understand what someone's mind goes through before they commit suicide. But as people, we can come to understand that we do not know everything about mental illnesses and how it makes our minds think, perceive, and react.
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Old 01-15-2014, 04:27 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Irish Pride View Post
Having no clue what his mental status was, I hardly think it appropriate to call it a selfish thing to do or a self-absorbed act. Clearly he might not have been thinking right, and if he wasn't thinking right then chances are he wasn't just thinking of himself. People take their lives for a variety of different reasons, please give me just two of the variety of reasons, that aren't selfbased"It's all about me" or "It's the best thing for -me-" isn't always the case, and I highly wonder how many times it actually is just about them.

It actually surprises me when people say it is selfish or self-absorbed, because...if there is no suicide note (and even if there is) how could you POSSIBLY tell? The sheer fact that we are outsiders and making that kind of judgement boggles my mind to no end. I find it extremely insulting that we can pass judgement on a man whom we have never met, and DARE say that he is selfish or self-absorbed. ironically you are passing judgment right now, your's is just a neutral judgment on him and a negative judgment on those who are calling him wrong, no one can say judging is judgmental without being judgmental themselves,

The man could have had a mental illness and we are passing that kind of judgement. Selfish would be internalizing and analyzing what would happen after. absolutely wrong 1. My family would find me, 2. My kid would grow up with no father. both of these are selfless and thinking of others and only counter your argument These things might not even have entered his mind and that doesn't mean he was selfish in his decision. It could mean he wasn't in the right state of mind. It could mean that he was on medication that gave him suicidal thoughts. It could mean he was clinically depressed with no diagnosis.actually it WOULD still mean he is selfish, but what you are describing would merely offer excuses for him to be selfish, not make it any less selfish

Do we look at a child with autism and say that there lack of social skills is because they are so withdrawn inside of themselves that they only think of themselves? That they are selfish? actually everyone who has an autistic child knows that that child is one hundred percent selfish, they just understand that the child might not be able to help it, which is true mental illness, but I will be willing to bet big that cat wasn't married to an autistic guyNo....why? Because we understand autism. We do not fully understand mental illnesses.

I've lost two friends to suicide. One was suffering from schizophrenia. Another we aren't sure why he took his life. He was seventeen and was extremely loving, had many friends, had sports scholarships to college. He was on a medication that could have been the cause.

We will probably never fully understand what someone's mind goes through before they commit suicide. But as people, we can come to understand that we do not know everything about mental illnesses and how it makes our minds think, perceive, and react.
just up and calling him selfish isn't right, ......he needs to be called a coward and a murderer too.

Just cause you murder yourself doesn't mean you are no less a murderer
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Old 01-15-2014, 04:30 AM
adamt adamt is offline
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Originally Posted by MattHughesRocks View Post
I agree 110%.
Depression is a sad, sad, life taking decease. People that are THAT deep into it are not capable of thinking about how it will affect others.
unfortunately it is a very common thing today for overwhelming self pity to be diagnosed as depression, I have no sympathy for people who are merely wallowing in self pity
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