Putting Your Affairs in Order!
The doctor, after an examination, sighed and said, 'I've
got some bad news. You have cancer, and you'd best
put your affairs in order.'
The woman was shocked, but managed to compose herself
and walk into the waiting room where her daughter had been
waiting. 'Well, daughter, we women celebrate when things are
good, and we celebrate when things don't go so well. In this
case, things aren't well. I have cancer. So, let's head to
the club and have a martini.'
After 3 or 4 martinis, the two were feeling a little less
somber. There were some laughs and more martinis. They
were eventually approached by some of the woman's old
friends, who were curious as to what the two were
celebrating. The woman told her friends they were drinking
to her impending end, 'I've been diagnosed with AIDS.' The
friends were aghast, gave the woman their condolences and
beat a hasty retreat.
After the friends left, the woman's daughter leaned
over and whispered, 'Momma, I thought you said you were
dying of cancer, and you just told your friends you were
dying of AIDS! Why did you do that??'
'Because I don't want any of those bitches sleeping
with your father after I'm gone.'
And THAT, my friends, is what is called, 'Putting
Your Affairs In Order.'