Originally Posted by Play The Man
Who says that the wants of the deceased can not be geared to provide for the needs of the living?
I'm sure they could. My point..again..was simply that I would prefer to gear my funeral towards what my family wishes and not what I want. Brother when you die by all means do what every you want. Free country bro... it's you funeral.
I, myself, have not planned out my funeral, but I imagine that as I get older, I probably will make some stipulations. For example, I will probably instruct my family to use some of my estate money to purchase Bibles and make them available free to any mourner that wants one. Would that plan be selfish?
I didn't say every element of a persons funeral was selfish...give away all the free Bibles you want... mighty kind gesture!! But for most people a funeral is one last opportunity for them to do what they want. It's normally geared at the wants of the deceased. I think it should be geared at the needs of those left behind. We can disagree. It'll be ok... really...
How is it benefiting me, to the detriment of my neighbor?
It's not. Look up... in the blue there... I answered this
Chuck, you spouted out an opinion without even waiting for anyone to consider the question and provide reasons concerning why they would make a particular request or plan.
Was there some rules to responding to your thread I wasn't aware of our are you just upset because you didn't get the answers you were hoping for? Didn't you ask for opinions? This is still an open forum right? Where we're all welcome to post in various threads... share our thoughts, opinions etc? Do you know something I don't?
You questioned motives before a motive was even offered.
I didn't question anything. I made a statement. You stated that part of your reason for starting the thread was to start conversation. It's started... and.... you're welcome.
You mentioned that your family is all Christian. That is great! However, you were concentrating on your situation without thinking of people in other situations
Of course I was concentrating on my situation that's the "situation" I was talking about.. I really don't care about other people's situations... they can do whatever they want with their funeral.
(One could even say that that is the definition of self-centeredness, if one wanted to be unkind).
One can say whatever the heck One wants....we're all welcome to our own opinion.. or one's own opinion I guess.
A huge portion of my extended family is Buddhist and a funeral would literally be the only time that they would be open to hearing the Gospel. Please don't attribute selfish motives without hearing people out. It isn't very kind.
Did you even read my posts??? Why would you share the Gospel at your funeral? Because your extended Buddhist family NEEDS to hear it... exactly my point...put the needs of the living (your family) before the wants of the deceased.. if they happen to be the same thing all the better!!!
I think your opinion could have been stated more diplomatically, such as: "I think that planning one's own funeral could easily, if one was not careful, lead to a funeral that did not take the needs of the mourners into consideration."
Um yeah... probably not though.. that's a little too wordy for me.. that's more of a Dave answer.
Most people when planning their funeral tend to think about themselves... they pick out songs they like, flowers they like etc... they make it all about them... they think it's their last "hurrah"... I think that's selfish. YOU don't have to. You can think anything you want... it's a big world.. there is room in it for more then one opinion.