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Bonnie 10-03-2012 10:09 PM

Butt-Chugging
 
If you want people to read your article just put the word butt-chugging in the title...it hooked me so I thought I'd try it. :laugh: Video...

http://dailycaller.com/2012/10/03/de...e-today-video/

Quote:

Deadly serious ‘butt chugging’ press conference is the most accidentally hilarious thing you’ll see today [VIDEO]

Published: 12:28 PM 10/03/2012

ByTaylor Bigler

This deadly serious press conference is the most accidentally hilarious thing you will see all day, and maybe all week.

Alexander Broughton, a (former) member of the Pi Kappa Alpha fraternity at the University of Tennessee, was rushed to the hospital last Thursday after consuming a copious amount of the ultra-classy boxed wine Franzia. He wound up with a blood alcohol content level of .40 — five times the recommended limit.

Local news reports immediately surfaced that the frat bro was engaged in “butt chugging,” an allegedly real thing kids these days do to get drunk very quickly.

Butt chugging really needs no explanation, because it is exactly what it sounds like: A person ingests alcohol from an orifice that is not the mouth, and thus alcohol is absorbed more quickly into the bloodstream. Basically, it’s like mainlining alcohol via the rectum.

Pi Kappa Alpha was swiftly banned from campus, and the fraternity’s lawyer attempted to do damage control by holding a wildly unnecessary press conference Monday afternoon at UT.

Every minute of the following video is well worth watching. Firstly, the elderly lawyer in a bow tie, Daniel McGehee, says the phrase “butt chugging” six times during the eight-and-a-half minute video. (At one point, McGehee says that the inaccurate story has spread across the entire “United Nations.”)

Secondly, the first thing he comes out swinging against is not the fraternity’s banishment, nor the poor kid’s tarnished reputation, but rather his sexual orientation.

“Mr. Broughton [the accused butt chugger] denies each and every allegation whatsoever that has been infered that he may have been a gay man. He is a straight man,” McGehee says. “And he thinks the idea and concept of butt chugging is repulsive.”

The entire fraternity stands behind the McGehee and Broughton in what must have been some sort of wager — First person who laughs on-camera has to butt chug Franzia! – is how we like to imagine this went down.


Neezar 10-03-2012 11:03 PM

:laugh:

We have seen some of this in the ER. (and worse :unsure-1:) Very Dangerous. If you drink too much your body will try to vomit to protect itself. This way it can do nothing to stop when it's too much.

Neezar 10-03-2012 11:04 PM

The comments under that article are funny, too.

One
Quote:


Butt chugging. A HOLE new way to HOLE your liquor!


:huh::laugh:

Bonnie 10-03-2012 11:29 PM

:laugh:

I'm waiting to see what Mike says! :laugh:

Bonnie 10-03-2012 11:42 PM

Okay, a couple from me:

"Bottoms Up!"

:scared0011:

:laugh:


If "it" could talk:

"Hellooo! Do I need to post an "EXIT ONLY" sign?!"

:laugh:

flo 10-04-2012 06:01 AM

Ew. Silly frat boys, they can't get drunk quick enough the "old-fashioned" way?

C'mon now, is this from The Onion? I keep thinking 'Animal House" :-) Good find, Bon.

:laugh: :laugh:

flo 10-04-2012 06:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Neezar (Post 195258)
:laugh:

We have seen some of this in the ER. (and worse :unsure-1:) Very Dangerous. If you drink too much your body will try to vomit to protect itself. This way it can do nothing to stop when it's too much.

Oh, I guess it *is* for real. :unsure: Idiot college kids.

Bonnie 10-04-2012 09:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Neezar (Post 195258)
:laugh:

We have seen some of this in the ER. (and worse :unsure-1:) Very Dangerous. If you drink too much your body will try to vomit to protect itself. This way it can do nothing to stop when it's too much.

So how do you counteract the alcohol poisoning, drugs?

County Mike 10-04-2012 11:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bonnie (Post 195260)
:laugh:

I'm waiting to see what Mike says! :laugh:

Now I feel too much pressure and can't come up with anything funny enough.

Especially since it's frat boys. If it was sorority girls, I might have a few ideas of how to plunger the excess alcohol out for them.

Neezar 10-04-2012 02:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bonnie (Post 195271)
So how do you counteract the alcohol poisoning, drugs?

Keep them alive (hopefully) while their body processes it out. And flush them with fluids and replace electrolytes. That's all you can do.


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